Current song: "Send Me On My Way" ~Rusted Root (I dare you to say this song doesn't make you want to get up and dance every single time you hear it. I dare you.)
It's been about five months since my last blog, and there's good reason for it: I've been lazy and uninspired. Now that that's out of the way, we can move on to more important matters.
As I was reading over my few few blog entries, I realized that I do a lot of writing about nostalgia and things passed. You could say I'm stuck in the past in the worst kind of way. I miss it. It was more fun than now is, though I'm sure some time in the future I'll catch myself saying "2011 was way more fun than now is!" Maybe when I'm in labor or getting my first divorce or dealing with my obnoxious teenager. (I was bad, I'm sure my future children will be worse.)
So, in light of my realization that I focus too much on the past, I am dedicating a blog entry to the present. Right now. It may not be fun or pretty or heart-warming, but it'll be real and honest (and sometimes mean and whiny).
First, I look at my general, every day life right now. Is any of the following familiar? Monday through Friday: wake up at 7:30am, leave the house by 8:15am, stop at Dunkin Donuts (*note: this is an absolute must. Without this stop, I am lost, confused, scared, and downright bitchy.), drive to my office where I am either alone or accompanied by one or two other people who don't talk to me, do my work until 5pm, drive home (home, of course, being the house I grew up in, which I moved back into around Christmas with my mom and stepdad), watch "my programs" (American Idol--yes, I'm lame, Criminal Minds--anything for Matthew Gray Gubler, Law & Order: SVU--anything for Mariska Hargitay, and Glee--shut up.), and, finally, toss and turn in bed until 4am with my racing crazy-brain (thank you, Ariel) thoughts...then do it all over again.
Weekends are a bit different, but certainly not any more exciting. Saturdays consist of going to my Weight Watchers meetings at 10:30am (25lbs down though--woo!) and going out to dinner to celebrate my weight loss. (I'm thinking this is partially responsible for why the weight isn't coming off as fast as I'd like it to. "I lost three pounds this week! Let's get some celebratory chorizo, sour cream, and margaritas!" Fail.) Sundays consist of sleeping as late as humanly possible (9am, ugh) and working my one little shift at my restaurant at night. Oh, and bagels. There are always bagels available on the weekends--a lovely benefit of moving home. Free bagels!
So, now that I've spelled out my boring life, what does it all mean? Honestly, as a female in her mid-twenties living in the (201), this means I'm a little closer to rock bottom than I would like to be. The upside? I am far from alone.
We all know the economy sucks, unemployment is high, prices are crazy, blah blah. I'm sick of blaming EVERYTHING on the recession, although it's about 99% responsible for the massive amount of suck in our lives. There are other factors here too. There is more than the recession contributing to this "Boomerangers" generation (us--Gen X and Gen Y, apparently). I can only speak for myself, but I know I am not the only one.
First, there's growing up and living in northern New Jersey, specifically Bergen County. As we all know, this is one of the most expensive places in the US to live. The average income here is about triple the national average income. This means that pretty much everything here COSTS triple the amount it does in the rest of the country. Houses and apartments, of course, are number one on this list. It's madness. When a friend of mine was looking to move out to Pennsylvania (outside the Pittsburgh area), she was more than shock-and-awed by the prices. Here, a small one bedroom apartment is at least $1,000.00 a month, if not more. In fact, that would be a steal! Where my friend was looking, she found several 2 bedroom apartments that were newly revamped and in lovely areas...for $450.00 a month...utilities included. This was our first glimpse into the revelation that "Holy crap! We are paying waaaay too much here in Jersey." It was not pretty.
Taking into consideration that living on one's own costs about triple out here than pretty much everywhere else (other than Beverly Hills and some random town in Connecticut), we now must look at salaries. It used to be that the reason people lived in an expensive area was because they could afford it. And the "mature adults" out there still can, such as my parents. They have the incomes to be able to afford a house (each--they each have their own house...I'm just sayin') and can do so because they had fair starting salaries when they began their careers and were able to get married in their early twenties, live on their own while saving money, buy a home, and raise their children. All right here in the (201). I'm not saying it was flawless or ideal all the time, I'm just saying it was fair. What they earned at the start of their careers was appropriate with the cost of living. That is no longer the case.
In the 30 years between my parents being 20-somethings and myself being stuck in this fantastic (note the sarcasm) age range, the cost of living (especially here) has skyrocketed out of control, while starting salaries haven't even come close. It's all relative (number-wise) and right now, the percentages just DON'T add up the way they used to. It's not OK that starting salaries in the NY/NJ metro area are still below the national average when the price to live here is more than triple the national cost of living. Employers take advantage of the recession by pimping out jobs that used to pay $40,000 a year to desperate recent college grads and the unemployed for $25,000 a year instead. Rejoice, big (and small) business! It's like going back to indentured servitude.
Most of us who have already watched the dust settle from our fun, carefree college years are now stuck in the mud of our mid-twenties to mid-thirties, wishing we could back-track...or afford grad school. There are very few jobs, and the ones that are available barely pay enough for us to break even after we've paid for our car payments, car insurance, cell phone bills, gas, student loans, health insurance, prescriptions, doctor visits, etc.---never mind rent, if you, too, have tried (and maybe failed, like me) at living on your own. Not to mention that, for most of us, we are in no way in the job we thought we'd have when we were going through college.
So, to sum up, most of us are in our mid to late twenties (give or take), living at home with our parents (either having boomeranged home--me--or having never left at all yet--most people), working menial jobs that we have little to no passion for, spending every dollar we own on necessary not-so-much-fun things, and leaving ourselves very little time to enjoy our lives. Without much money, it's hard to "go out and party and have fun," especially if you have to go to work in the morning or have errands to run on the weekend. Living at home with our parents gives us little to no privacy (this is no one's fault, just a fact), so social/love lives are strained, and all of this adds up to having no motivation and no hope for our futures. We are the first generation who will NOT exceed our parents financially, we have already "outlived" them by being much older when we marry, have kids, etc. And this is all really depressing.
It seems we only have one way out. Start your own business and hope it succeeds. This is my ultimate dream...and I'll blog about it some time. ;) Meanwhile, I (we) continue to live day-to-day in this strange purgatory of our twenties, desperate for hope. I am open to suggestions...
Current song: "Heart-Shaped Box (Live)" ~Nirvana (This is my all-time favorite Nirvana song, and the live version is incredible. Kurt was 27 when he died and had a lot accomplished...hmm...)
